I just read the results of an interesting study done down south. Apparently americans spend approximately three hours per week grooming themselves and looking good, but less than an hour (per week people) on foreplay and intercourse. So it appears the collective mass would rather look good in bed than be good in bed.

Here’s a couple of paragraphs from the write-up.

Americans spend nearly three hours every week grooming themselves, but less than one hour on foreplay and sexual intercourse. It’s no wonder that only 46% of us describe our love lives as exciting, or existent for that matter.

On average, Americans spend 35 minutes on foreplay and sexual intercourse each session. And since we have sex once every 4.3 days, that averages out to about 57 minutes per week and 14 minutes below the global average.

Durex also revealed that Americans are having a lot less sex than just about everyone else in the world, and when we do, less than half are fully satisfied. Great job, U.S.

How does the US compare to other countries, namely Canada? Well, here it is:

American men average 13 partners, which is:
– Ten less than Canadians (23)
– Three less than the British (16)
– One less than Mexicans (14)
– Equal to the global average (13)

American women average nine partners, which is:
– One less than Canadians (10)
– One less than the British (10)
– Three more than Mexicans (6)
– Two more than the global average (7)

Americans Are Shitty Lovers

Apparently us guys in Canada are machines. So for you gals south of the border feeling a little under-loved and under-cuddled, why don’t grab your lingerie and make the long trek up to the great white north — we’ll look after you.

**disclaimer: I am a Canadian guy that never has had, nor ever will have, sex with a pie. In fact, pretty much all pastry is out. I just don’t roll that way.