The Great Perogy Battle

Last modified on December 12th, 2006

Tonight I had the stupid idea that I would come home from work and make a huge batch of perogies. Normally, I don’t attempt anything that dumb — at least not while sober — but with a big potlock coming up this weekend, I really need something to bring. Since I know my friends all like my grandma’s perogies, I decided to attempt that.

Little Bundles of Love

So, I realize I’m not my grandma, and there’s no possible way I could put as much love and ukranian charm into my perogies as she does hers, but I thought I would take a stab at it. I’ve done this a few times, but at most I make perogies once a year, and everytime I forget just how much friggin work it is. First thing I had to do was call baba (my grandma) last night and get her to fill in the gaps in my memory. I knew the basics, but I forgot the little bits and pieces.

First problem with making perogies is that I really don’t have much food at home. To be honest, I hate grocery shopping. Like really hate it. If I had to choose between not eating for a day or going down to the grocery store, picking out food, standing in long lines, and then making three trips up from my parkade to the 15th floor, I think I’d rather starve. So, on my way home, I stopped at the IGA, hoping to only get a few things. Before I knew it, I had three heavy bags of stuff for the perogy battle, in addition to my laptop bag and my umbrella. I walked another 15 minutes, doing some weird funky shuffle down Howe street, trying to keep everything in balance. When I got to my place, my hands were killing me. This is the part of living downtown I hate.

I’ll skip all the stuff I had to do to make these things, but let me sum it up like this — I spent nearly four hours slaving over the frickin stove, cutting potatoes, rolling dough, pinching perogies — and that only amounted to 49 perogies. So, if you do the math, that’s about 4.8 minutes per perogy.

4.8 minutes. Per perogy.

The Filling

My god, are these things a lot of work. I really don’t know how baba does it.

The sad part is 49 perogies isn’t really alot, not for a group of people. Heck, I bet I could kill off 25 perogies myself if I was hungry enough, and my friend Brennen could probably do the whole lot himself. I think there are at least 12 people going to be at this dinner. It’s a potlock, so I really don’t have to bring a ton of perogies, but I definitely need to make at least one more batch. So, I can definitely look forward to giving up yet another night of my life this week making more of these frickin things.

Next time I’m bringing desert.

Update – I checked out Red Square based on one of the comments. Here’s a description of their perogies:

Vareniki come frozen in a 1 lb plastic bag. To serve, simply empty the package into a pot of rapidly boiling water and boil for up to 5 minutes, stirring occasionally until they float to the top; strain and serve with sour cream and fried onions. Vareniki are very low in fat, are cholesterol-free, and provide a delicious and highly nutritious meal. Note that the Vareniki dough is made with no fats or eggs.

They actually sound not bad. The only difference is that baba’s dough is made from vegetable fat and eggs, which is why it probably taste so damn good.

5 responses to “The Great Perogy Battle”

  1. S says:

    Here are some easier ways to bring perogies to a potluck

    Option 1) Take your car, drive to 8626-A Joffre Avenue in Burnaby to a place called Red Square ( and buy a $10 bag of cheddar perogies. Cook them. Everyone is happy and you got to visit a part of Burnaby you probably never knew existed. Actually combined that with a trip to National Cheese Factory down the road (sorta speak) and pick up some cheese curds for your poutine making exercises and you have a pretty succesful grocery trip.

    Option 2) Make sure the potluck is held on the last Friday of the month (hmm might be the first Friday) and then drive to Ukrainian Church on East 10th (@main) buy a whole bunch and drive straight to the potluck.
    You can even buy some kielbasa and cabbage rolls and be the Ukrainian king of the party.

  2. Tom says:

    Duane, I think you should try and make some Cabbage Rolls to take to the potluck to go with those nice perogies. They are probably way easier….just a little cabbage….just a little rice etc…and voila.

  3. Duane says:

    Option 2 sounds pretty good Sylvain. I don’t think I have the heart to bring manufactured perogies to a party, only the hand pinched ones.

    I should try cabbage rolls sometime. I’ve heard they are a bit easier. But perogies are just potato and dough so I didn’t expect them to be this time consuming either. Now I know why baba sets aside a whole day to make a batch.

  4. Dustin says:

    I could easily fuck over 49 perogies myself. How about a drive to the liquor store, 2 bags of perogies, coleslaw, warm bums, gravy…

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *